If You Can't Fix It, Forget It

Emotions-one word-emotions-says so much. Just how much? Think where your emotions can take you or where they don't take you. Well, this week for me has been a swirling, twirling mass of emotions that has had me on the merry-go-round of emotions to an emotional roller coaster ride that just wasn't going to stop until I derailed. Am I ready for the amusement park or the funny farm? Well, the emotions that I have felt have been sadness, happiness, joy, anger, how can this be??!! feeling, surprise, incredulity, disbelief, and just so much more. All I know that, the one word, emotions can describe so much in one breath. Well, my breath has been taken away, but I am getting it back.

Well, I am not going down, so I have two ways to go-straight up or sideways. So, I am the driver of my own train, so I am choosing to go straight up. So hang on, this emotional chauffeur is going to drive myself right off the emotional road I am on. I realized my jalopy of a car had been sitting and spinning its wheels, going no where fast. I am a fixer. If there is something or someone, who needs to be fixed and helped, then just give me a shout or holler over my roaring engine and I'll come as quick as my tires will allow me.

But those tires have been sitting in the same rut for ten years and my spinning wheels have worn out the macadam road, digging down to our earth's gift-dirt. Oh, boy, I wasn't going to stop spinning those nearly rubber bare tires for nothing. I was on a mission that I hadn't fixed, but by golly- I am a fixer and that's what fixer's do-they fix no matter what the situation is. But this fixer didn't realize there was no fixing in this particular situation and there never would be a fix. So, as I was spinning those well used tires and kicking up dirt, my under carriage was sinking and hitting the ground. My engine was a smoking, coughing and hiccuping from the constant revving, my headlights to no where I was going had burned out long ago and my tail lights had burned out as well, leaving a shady gray past behind. My rear view mirror was slightly cracked and causing a distorted view. Well, my jalopy was just barely functioning. I had run that brand new, sparkling, vibrant car right into the ground. I was headed to China if I kept on spinning those wheels at the rate I was going. "STOP! STOP!," my engine shrieked, whined, begged and finally said," enough is enough, if you don't stop, then you will be stuck here for life-on a worn out, desolate, lonely macadam road bound to nowhere. "

Well, how can you not accept this bit of advice that has kept you moving-albeit not in the right direction because you, the driver have been steering in the wrong direction. Whose to argue with the engine that keeps you running? That swirling smoke had blinded me, but as it dissipated, my view was coming back clearer and clearer. Turn that engine over one more time, drive out of that old rut and head on down that lonely, desolate road to the fork in road. Toss the old coin residing in the crammed, filled glove box and pick the next road you're going to take out of that well defined rut. Yeah, life is a flip of the coin, but don't forget when the road you are taking takes you to no where, you can always flip that coin and choose a new path to try. Make your own new trail, not trial like me. Here's hoping your new road brings you new emotions that are only the positive kind.

The dictionary states that emotion-noun- a strong feeling as of fear, anger, love, joy and so on. AAH, I've felt these all and even more. I embody the word emotions-so hard to control, so easy to change. Our essence is emotions, whether good or bad. Well, my emotions are going to take me where the sun shines, the flowers bloom, the sound of a chirping bird sings, the fireflies light up the night and the stars shine down to guide us. I am ready to finally take a new road that will bring me somewhere, instead of no where. Join me on my new found road.

Betty D., thank you for that one liner that says it all about trying to fix things or people-if you can't fix it, forget it.

Marcia-thank you for listening to my tires spinning and spraying all kinds of emotions-you said it all with JUST LET IT GO !!! Well, it is going, going, gone.

Judi-your straight, forward no nonsense, can do attitude has lifted me more than once in my life. Actually, you have been and continue to be my lifeline, that is worth more to me than a million bucks.

Huck-your outlook on life keeps me laughing, despite the pain-you make me gain where I think all is lost- you are my wonder drug and my drug of choice in life-you are that sweet, kind cousin of mine that I so much adore.

Mom-you still are the wind beneath my broken wings and the gas in my jalopy that keeps my wheels a spinning- I will be filling up your tank to overflowing once I am back on my feet.

Well, Wynonna and I have this thing called, ATTITUDE and we sure do know how to use it. Here's our anthem and we love to share our Attitude. Sing along with your own attitude.